Susan Hall in a ULEZ car Andy Street on the street Conservatives out in Blackpool South And rare in a council seat
Sunak’s disappointed But says that the plan is working Meanwhile back in Rochdale George Galloway is lurking (Pro-Palestine but anti-woke It’s somewhat disconcerting)
Rotherham, confusingly Is back in Liverpool And Coronation Street’s in Yorkshire But Teeside’s under the Baron’s rule
If you want all the stories Laura only talks to Tories Still squawking Stop The Boats While just not getting many votes
Refugees on barges Jeering little Farages When Britannia ruled the waves James Bibby was transporting slaves Meanwhile humanitarians Are Nick Ferrari’s enemy
Refugees on prison ships Suella’s bag of cruel tricks Singing Rule Britannia Let’s make you all unhappier Somewhere there’s a statue That needs chucking in the sea
Rat Run Rishi’s put his foot to the floor Rat Run Rishi loves the motorist more Low traffic neighbourhoods, he doesn’t think we should He’s bringing high traffic back to the neighbourhood Where we’ve got shit in the water, grit in the air We’ve got the top down, got the wind in our hair The freedom of the highway, the myth that sells you cars While the freedom of the skies is his, not ours ‘Cause Rishi’s commute is in a luxury chopper Not in the morning rush like your average shopper Meanwhile in the countryside, his kids breathe clean, fresh air He’s on the side of motorists, Rishi doesn’t care
The tide’s been going out for ages Rishi’s got a bucket and spade There’s a little bit less to go around these days So Rishi’s got a new game He knows he’s not the most popular kid But Rishi’s got a plan The tide’s been going out for ages And he’s drawing swastikas in the sand
Swastikas in the sand He’s drawing swastikas in the sand The tide’s been going out for ages And he’s drawing swastikas in the sand
Jonathan and Lee think that Rishi’s fab They want to join in the game Please let us play with you Rishi This lark should really have a name I’m going to call it Stop the Boats Whoever’s on them just gets banned The tide’s been going out for ages And they’re drawing swastikas in the sand
Swastikas in the sand They’re drawing swastikas in the sand The tide’s been going out for ages And they’re drawing swastikas in the sand
There’s hundreds and millions and billions Suella joins the game with glee I bet I can stop the boats the best Oh Rishi, won’t you play with me We can pretend they’re all evil And we should never let them land The tide’s been going out for ages And she’s drawing swastikas in the sand
Swastikas in the sand She’s drawing swastikas in the sand The tide’s been going out for ages And she’s drawing swastikas in the sand
Swastikas in the sand They’re drawing swastikas in the sand The tide’s been going out for ages And they’re drawing swastikas in the sand
Diddy Rishi Dastardly’s petard will soon be hoist “Yes General”, he says to the off-screen muffled voice But Zilly’s done a runner, he thinks Rwanda isn’t fair And Klunk has got a legal plan that hasn’t got a prayer While Dastardly just wants the Vulture Squadron in the air ‘Cause Yankee Doodle Refugee will lose him Red Wall votes While Muttley snickers “medal”, he’s crying “Stop the boats!”
They’re running rather than getting beat They’re starting to vote with their feet The rats are leaving faster than the ship can sink Like their shit doesn’t stink Like their shit ain’t on the brink Like it ain’t shit to think That money goes to money is okay That money goes to money is the only way That money goes to money Goes to money goes to money
Meanwhile in an imaginary navy Penny’s insincere smile Mouths coyly look at me Admire my philanthropy Admire my new food pantry While opposing free school meals Don’t that just hit you in the feels? A proper Scrooge turned fake Marley As the money goes to money Goes to money goes to money
The posties on the picket know They’ve got to hold the line Firefighters, nurses, teachers Among the left behind As the money goes to money And the warm bank number grows The money goes to money And the pubs begin to close As the money goes to money Goes to money goes to money
They ain’t here to manage the crisis Just the TV news This morning’s media message is Another excuse to bruise The money goes to money As they put the word about That there ain’t no money You’ll just have to do without As the money goes to money Goes to money goes to money
Lynch’s mob don’t need to strike The train’s already fucked And Mrs Smith’s replacement hips Well, she’s just out of luck Hancock, pushed, jumped anyway Says he’s still got lots to say Not even in opposition Would there be a point to listen While the money goes to money Goes to money goes to money
The money knows no borders The money knows no shame The money only hears the sighs Of the rich who coo its name Like Michelle, Robber Baroness The PPE millionairess Banished as Rishi fakes it tough She’ll be back soon enough As the money goes to money Goes to money goes to money
Money goes to money While the rest get less and less Money goes to money What a fuckin’ mess
Steve White & The Protest Family 