Therese Coffey
Says there’s loads of PPE.
She doesn’t understand why lots of doctors disagree.
While Eamonn Holmes on ITV,
Ridiculously,
Won’t rule out 5G.
And if they’re not culling the herd
But flattening the curve,
Why are the real figures not preferred?
Because it turns out care home deaths don’t count.
So, what really is the full amount?
What’s paramount?
Public relations, public health or a profit and loss account?
What did you do in the lockdown Dad?
Did your boss insist that you still came in?
Did they give you gloves and facemasks Dad?
Did they care you might catch COVID-19?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do in the lockdown, Mum?
How bad was it in the hospital?
How did you do it without PPE, Mum?
Do you think the government cared at all?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do in the lockdown Dad?
How scared were you when you got your score?
With your age and your conditions, Dad
Did you understand what they did that for?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do in the lockdown, Mum?
Did you stay indoors? Did you stay on the sofa?
Is that when you got pregnant, Mum?
Is that why Dad calls me Corona?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do in the lockdown, Dad?
Did you sneak a few mates round for a barbeque?
Did you have a beer and a laugh then, Dad?
Is that why the government blamed you?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do in the lockdown, Mum?
Did you dust off your uniform and go back to service?
Did you have a row about staying at home?
Did the risks not make you nervous?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do in the lockdown, Dad?
With your investment portfolio?
Did your hedge fund do alright then Dad?
Did the crisis help your money to grow?
What did you do, what did you do?
What did you do, what did you do?
Matt Hancock, what did you do?
Dominic Raab, what did you do?
Priti Patel, what did you do?
Boris Johnson, what did you do?
She’s sorry that you think that it’s a lot of people dying
She’s sorry that you think that the government aren’t trying
She’s sorry that you think that they’re not testing enough people
She’s sorry that you think that their response is pretty feeble
She’s sorry
Priti Sorry (Not sorry)
She’s sorry that you think that there’s too little PPE
She’s sorry that you think that it’s not much of an apology
She’s sorry, Priti Sorry (Not sorry)
She’s sorry that you think that the government could do better
She’s sorry that you didn’t like Boris Johnson’s letter
She’s sorry that you think that nurses shouldn’t be wearing bin bags
She’s sorry that you didn’t like her stint between the flags
She’s sorry
Priti Sorry (Not sorry)
She’s sorry that you think that there’s too little PPE
She’s sorry that you think that it’s not much of an apology
She’s sorry, Priti Sorry (Not sorry)
She’s sorry that you think they’re failing the frontline
She’s sorry that you think that they wasted too much time
She’s sorry that you don’t find her words conciliatory
She’s sorry that you don’t think she’s actually sorry
She’s sorry
Priti Sorry (Not sorry )
She’s sorry that you think that there’s too little PPE
She’s sorry that you think that it’s not much of an apology
She’s sorry, Priti Sorry (Not sorry)
While Boris is taking short walks around the ward
And the economy is frantically hurtling toward
A crisis likes of which we can ill afford
Jacob’s making money with his hedge fund
While doctors and nurses are dying for their labour
No thought for their safety as they try to save their neighbour
A crisis from the likes of which we all need a saviour
Jacob’s making money with his hedge fund
A hedge fund ain’t for the likes of you and me
A hedge fund to the key worker is still a mystery
A hedge fund makes a profit on other people’s misery
And Jacobs making money with his hedge fund
While bus drivers are dying taking key workers to work
And the death toll is rising every day just like clockwork
It’s a crisis from the likes of which no minister should shirk
And Jacobs making money with his hedge fund
A hedge fund ain’t for the likes of you and me
A hedge fund to the key worker is still a mystery
A hedge fund makes a profit on other people’s misery
And Jacobs making money with his hedge fund
If you’re having a bad day
He’s having a good day
If you’re having a bad day
He’s having a good day
If you’re having a bad day
He’s having a good day
‘Cos Jacob’s making money with his hedge fund
He is risen
Like a loaf of bread
Like Jesus from the dead
From his ICU bed
He is risen
Like a hot air balloon
Turns out he’s not immune
The blond buffoon
He is risen
Like a head of steam
His dad said
He’s taken one for the team
He is risen
Like every virus measure
Like your blood pressure
When you got his letter
He is risen
But he’s not the messiah
He won’t take you higher
Don’t you wish this was satire?
Wouldn’t you expect
The Housing Secretary
To have more than one house?
It must be very
Confusing
Which one you’re supposed to be in
When you told the rest of us
To be disciplined.
Wouldn’t you expect
The Housing Secretary
To have more than one house?
In fact, he has three:
One in town,
One in the country,
And one in his constituency.
So, when he said “don’t travel to your second home”
He left travel from your first to your third alone.
There’s a story to tell about Priti Patel
Who headed for the hills when her boss was unwell
And used the virus as opportunity
To free her work from scrutiny
Now she’s running away
There’s a story to tell about Priti Patel
Who failed to notice the major groundswell
Of opinion about the jobs fulfilled
By people that she called unskilled
Now she’s running away
We’re talking bus drivers, nurses, carers, shelf stackers
Refuse collectors, fruit pickers and packers
Teachers, cleaners, working on the Tube
Delivering the post and your parcels too
Low paid workers in often poor conditions
No room on this list for entitled politicians
There’s a story to tell about Priti Patel
Who knows full well ’bout NHS personnel
Everyone’s seen their value to the nation
But she won’t change her rules on immigration
That’s why she’s running away
We’re talking bus drivers, nurses, carers, shelf stackers
Refuse collectors, fruit pickers and packers
Teachers, cleaners, working on the Tube
Delivering the post and your parcels too
Low paid workers in often poor conditions
No room on this list for entitled politicians
There’s a story to tell about Priti Patel
Who headed for the hills when her boss was unwell
She’s fourth in line to be Tory Leader
But it’s been weeks since anyone has seen her
Guess she’s running away
Farage wants to know who gets the button
Farage wants to know who gets to drop the bomb
In the middle of the crisis with Johnson gone
Farage is worried ‘bout the virus
Farage thinks that it will stop us getting Brexit done
His one trick pony race is not yet run
Farage doesn’t rate the current cabinet
Farage thinks he’s better than the whole current shit show
From the comfort of a radio studio
Farage says all politics is vile
Farage is telling callers not to get involved
Like his own political career has been absolved
You might tune in to listen to Eddie Mair
But the moral of this story should not come as a shock
Turn your radio back over at six o’clock
While the prime minister is indisposed,
Here’s the government pecking order, disclosed:
It goes Johnson, Raab, Sunak and Patel.
So now we’ve got Raab, ‘cos Johnson is unwell.
And if Raab goes down, Sunak gets a spell.
And should Sunak lose his sense of smell,
Fourth on the list is Priti Patel
So whatever your position on the PM’s condition
(There’s little to applaud about his hospital admission
Save a salutary lesson about the virus’ transmission
And recognition of the position of the nurses and clinicians)
Michael Gove must ponder on his omission
From a list that doesn’t bode well:
Johnson, Raab, Sunak and Patel.
The people of Barbados
Were buying ventilators
They had all the papers
That they were bought-and-paid-fors
But they were seized
‘Fore they hit the high seas
By the president’s decree
He’s a pirate now
The German police
Had their face masks seized
It’s hard to believe
From a plane in Thailand
Robbed on the tarmac
They just want their masks back
They just got a wisecrack
He’s a pirate now
And it’s a yo, ho, ho and a bottle of rum
Here comes Pirate President Trump
Lock up your medicines, here he comes
Its President Trump
He’s a pirate now
He’ll steal your medication,
Your PPE
‘Cos his recovery’s
A month behind the Chinese
He’ll offer big money
For your remedies
Or he’ll take ‘em for free
He’s a pirate now
And it’s a yo, ho, ho and a bottle of rum
Here comes Pirate President Trump
Lock up your medicines, here he comes
Its President Trump
He’s a pirate now
Steve White & The Protest Family 