The robot can’t stick its finger up your arse
But it can interpret your test results
So long as there’s sufficient comparators
In the health databases it consults
(A subject we may return to later
Is why Big Tech is after your NHS data)
And if there’s plenty of others to compare
Then speed-wise it’s in a different class
It can say yes or no without a human there
And it doesn’t stick its finger up your arse
Category: Steve
An Englishman’s Car is His Castle
Ellie lost her flat in a Section 21
Her landlord said your time has come
I’ve been made an offer I can’t refuse
I’m selling up and booking cruise
Patrick lost his flat in a Section 21
His landlord said next month you’re done
Your rent no longer covers the mortgage
It ain’t my fault there’s a housing shortage
Now an Englishman’s car is his castle
An Englishman’s home is his Ford Capri
An Englishman’s car is his castle
‘Cause only the very rich can own property
Simon lost his flat in a no-fault eviction
To the tune of his landlord’s benediction
I’m sorry that’s just the way the markets are
On Monday, Simon’s moving into his car
Now an Englishman’s car is his castle
An Englishman’s home is his Ford Capri
An Englishman’s car is his castle
‘Cause only the very rich can own property
Gary said they’re coming for your mum’s house too
That’s what very rich people do
You rent your home, you rent your Sky
You even rent your music off of Spotify
Off of Spotify
Gary said they’re coming for your mum’s house too
That’s what very rich people do
The subscription model of society
Where everything is owned by the super-wealthy
The super-wealthy
Now an Englishman’s car is his castle
An Englishman’s home is his Ford Capri
An Englishman’s car is his castle
Cause only the very rich can own property
Now an Englishman’s car is his castle
An Englishman’s home is his Ford Capri
An Englishman’s car is his castle
An Englishman’s home is his Ford Capri
An Englishman’s home ain’t owned by you or me
The American Dream
He wears his shoes way too big
And tells the most tremendous lies
He’s got magic healing ears
And two blind eyes for genocide
His allies are cosplay fascists
But the real deal is him
If you care to disagree
The boots come marching in
He’ll tell you that it’s beautiful
He’ll even tell you it’s a gift
All hail forty-seven
All hail President Grift
They spit, we hit
The words of President Unfit
He sent the army in to wash away their sins
And this is how it all begins
Trained by the sales team and TV
Rule by executive decree
The American dream, the American scream
Dissent suppressed live on your screen
He’ll tell you that it’s beautiful
He’ll even tell you it’s a gift
All hail forty-seven
All hail President Grift
The American dream is a crypto scheme
The American dream is a crypto scheme
A meme coin grifting new regime
The American Dream is a crypto scheme
The American dream is a crypto scheme
The American dream is a crypto scheme
While bombers fly in Middle Eastern skies
The American dream is a crypto scheme
He’ll tell you that it’s beautiful
He’ll even tell you it’s a gift
All hail forty-seven
All hail President Grift
Sir Kier is Late For the War
Dear Donny, I’m so sorry I was late
I thought we had two weeks to get the message straight
You know that’s what the airbases are there for, mate
When Ronnie bombed the Libyans, we didn’t hesitate
I’ve got Lammy standing ready with a statement to make
He knows there’s a special relationship at stake
And if there’s war to be made, then war we shall make
I could do with some ban-the-burqa action to take
So, let me know Donny, if you’re gonna bomb some more
I wanna be like Margaret and Tony before
Not getting invited would leave me pretty sore
Dear Donny, I’m sorry I was late for the war
Tacos
Old Man Trump, like a bad cartoon
Spittin’ in the situation Room
Said Hey Benny I have a plan
Let’s go ahead and bomb Iran
Let’s bomb Iran
Let’s bomb Iran
While Huckabee cheered and Huckabee cried
God, he said, is surely on your side
Like he told George, Invade Iraq
Old Man Trump, God’s got your back
God’s got his back
God’s got his back
Then Trump, he said, maybe I will
I do wish the Ayatollah ill
And I know my mouth just wrote a cheque
But I won’t decide ‘til the very last sec
The very last sec
The very last sec
And the whole world prayed for tacos
The whole world prayed for tacos
The whole world prayed for tacos
On the eve of World War Three
He said he’d bring peace to Ukraine
But Old Man Trump chickened out again
Sayin’ Well it really ain’t so bad
And I don’t wanna upset Vlad
Don’t wanna upset Vlad
Don’t wanna upset Vlad
He was gonna wipe Afghan off the face
And fire Little Rocket Man into space
But fire and fury never occurred
Thank God for Donny’s no-good word
His no-good word
His no-good word
And the whole world prayed for tacos
The whole world prayed for tacos
The whole world prayed for tacos
On the eve of World War Three
And the whole world prayed for tacos
The whole world prayed for tacos
The whole world prayed for tacos
On the eve of World War Three
The eve of World War Three
The eve of World War Three
President Grift
He wears his shoes way too big
And tells the most outrageous lies
He’s got magic healing ears
And blind eyes turned to genocide
His mates are cosplay fascists
But the real deal is him
Dare to disagree
And he’ll send the army in
(While political opponents
Are messily done in)
He’ll tell you that it’s beautiful
While beauty gets short shrift
All hail forty-seven
All hail President Grift
Trump’s Trooping of the Colour
They’re rolling out the tanks
For the trooping of Trump’s colours
While the army train their guns on the workers of L.A.
And he holds Benny’s hand
While he drops bombs on Iranians
And starves Palestinians
I pray for rain on his parade
Big Beautiful Bill
They call him Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
On his way
To Capitol Hill
Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
He ain’t gonna help you
When you ill
He’ll steal from the poor
To give to the rich
Big, beautiful Bill’s
A Robin Hood switch
Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
He’ll borrow money
Like no one else will
For every dollar
He’ll borrow half more
Big, beautiful Bill’s
Debt’s outa the door
Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Bill liked a girl
Her name was Liz
Her kinda thinkin’
Was a lot like his
She borrowed money
Until it went wrong
Like Bill she won’t listen
To the words of this song
Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
They call him Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
He ain’t gonna help you
When you fall ill
He’ll steal from the poor
To give to the rich
Big, beautiful Bill’s
A Robin Hood switch
Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
Big, beautiful Bill
The New Pharaohs of the West
He wears his shoes way too big
And tells the most tremendous lies
He’s got magic healing ears
And blind eyes to genocide
He’s one of the new pharaohs of the West
He’s one of the new pharaohs of the West
The illegal alien with a billion bucks
High on ket., tweets a curse
Dirty Donny was in bed with Jeff
In the file and so much worse
He’s one of the new pharaohs of the West
He’s one of the new pharaohs of the West
Two hundred and eighty cubits high
And build it just as wide
Build it on the bones of Palestinians
Build it in my new Gaza seaside
Donny’s living the American dream
He’s lived it since he was eighteen
And his father gave him his first million dollars
He’s one of the new pharaohs of the West
He’s one of the new pharaohs of the West
Two hundred and eighty cubits high
And build it just as wide
Build it on the bones of Palestinians
Build it in my new Gaza seaside
He was born in an emerald mine
In the South African sunshine
He’s cool with apartheid
Cool with conspiracy
He’s one of the new pharaohs of the West
He’s one of the new pharaohs of the West
Two hundred and eighty cubits high
And build it just as wide
Build it on the bones of Palestinians
Build it in my new Gaza seaside
Build it on the bones of Palestinians
Build it in my new Gaza seaside
The new pharaohs of the West
The new pharaohs of the West
The new pharaohs of the West
The new pharaohs of the West
The Kings of Asylum
Freezing cold in a Canvey caravan
Or powerless in a burned-out barrack room
This is the life of a refugee
In a billionaire slum landlord boom
Four-star hotel, with rats as well
A holiday park caravan
The King of asylum counts his money
And cares not for his fellow man
The Kings of Essex are the kings of asylum
Housing rats, cockroaches and refugees
The Kings of Essex are asylum pirates
Avoiding tax on the East Anglian high seas
The king of fat cat consultancy
Springs clear of his liability
Takes your money and exploits the weak
As handed out by the Ministry
The Kings of Essex are the kings of asylum
Housing rats, cockroaches and refugees
The Kings of Essex are asylum pirates
Avoiding tax on the East Anglian high seas
Smash the gangs, smash their yachts
The Rachman refugee-exploiting band
Smash the gangs, take their money
And house the refugees on their land
The Kings of Essex are the kings of asylum
Housing rats, cockroaches and refugees
The Kings of Essex are asylum pirates
Avoiding tax on the East Anglian high seas
Smash the gangs, smash their yachts
The Rachman refugee-exploiting band
Smash the gangs, take their money
And house the refugees on their land
Steve White & The Protest Family 