From Orwell’s imaginary pub
To an invitation to join the club
Arise, Sir Tim
We’re sure you’re gonna fit right in
Arise, Sir Tim Wetherspoon
The cheap booze in warehouses tycoon
The Brexit beermat cartoon
The politics of public and saloon
Arise, Sir Tim
Whose pubs are never prim
Whose pint is always full to the brim
Whose views are uniformly grim
From Orwell’s imaginary pub
To the King’s chummy little club
Raise a glass to Empire and Crown
You were never going to turn one down
C’mon Brits
It’s the spirit of the Blitz.
While the heroes do their bit
Here’s a list of the gits:
No sick pay at Wilko*, lay-offs at Sodhexo,
Tim Martin says that his staff can get a job at Tesco.
Libraries staying open right across academia
And Picturehouse sacked people who found out on social media.
So, c’mon Brits
It’s the spirit of the Blitz.
While the heroes do their bit
Here’s a list of the gits:
Hermes drivers isolating get twenty quid a day.
Giraffe staff use their annual leave or else they get no pay.
Aramark forced everyone into two week’s holiday
And Sports Direct’s still the worst employer in the UK.
So, c’mon Brits
It’s the spirit of the Blitz.
While the heroes do their bit
Here’s a list of the gits
JHoots pharmacy’s charging twenty quid for Calpol
And making staff take holiday was also Richard Branson’s call.
EasyJet stopped feeding theirs, but shareholders got paid
While holding out their hands for a bit of that state aid
So, c’mon Brits
It’s the spirit of the Blitz.
While the heroes do their bit
Here’s a list of the gits.
(This list, dear reader, I suspect is far from comprehensive.
The behaviour of some bosses is really quite offensive.
So, let me put it to you, clearly and concisely:
When this is over, spend your money ethically and wisely.)
(And stay out of ‘Spoons)
* They bowed to public pressure, eventually, and changed their minds.
Steve White & The Protest Family 