Build a better mousetrap Build it really nice Build a better mousetrap That don’t catch mice ‘Cause catching all the mice Ain’t a thing we wanna do We just wanna sell Mousetraps to you
What you’ve gotta understand is It ain’t about the mice What you’ve gotta understand Take my advice You wanna sell a thing That people need to buy again So here is the trick My friend
What you’ve gotta understand is It’s all about the profit The asset fund manager’s Fee in their pocket So if next door builds A better mousetrap than you He’s gonna invest In their mousetrap too
What you’ve gotta understand Is it doesn’t really matter If you own a bit of everything Your wallet gets fatter And investors don’t care If you really catch mice So long as the punters Are buying your device
Build a better mousetrap, they said, and the world will beat a path to your door.
So, we built a better mousetrap, and investors beat a path to our door. People started buying a better mousetrap and they were happy that they had a choice between a cheaper worse mousetrap and a dearer better mousetrap. And the investors were happy because they also had shares in the worse mousetrap company, so they made money whether people bought a worse mousetrap or a better mousetrap.
But investors like their money to make more money, so they said to the worse mousetrap company, let’s make the worse mousetrap more expensive, and they said to us, let’s make the better mousetrap more cheaply. And that’s what they did, and that what we did, because everybody needs to keep their investors happy.
People still had a choice because choice was important, but now it was between a not so cheap worse mousetrap and a not so good better mousetrap, and they weren’t happy. They said, everything is so expensive these days and, mousetraps were so much better in my day and, the people who make the mousetraps just don’t care, there’s just no craftsmanship anymore, and some even blamed the mice.
But the investors were happy, they’d increased their return. They knew that they couldn’t lose so long as they had shares in the better mousetrap company and the worse mousetrap company.
We told the investors that people weren’t happy, that mousetraps were very expensive now and that they didn’t even catch mice.
The investors said, the people didn’t understand, they should be happy, they have economic growth.
With fewer his majesties There’d be fewer dead Yet he leads the remembrance The old soldier said The symbols that you see Are there to show you who’s the boss They know that you’ll comply With the poppy and the cross
The poppy and the cross King and country and the rest It’s amazing what you’ll suffer To be told that you’re the best His Majesty don’t care For your sorrow and your loss So long as you’ll die for The poppy and the cross
That fella with the wreath, he said Signs the papers off To manufacture weapons For the poppy and the cross To ship them overseas For genocide in foreign lands His jacket wears a poppy But bloody are his hands
Bloody are his hands King and country and the rest It’s amazing what you’ll suffer To be told that you’re the best His Majesty don’t care For your sorrow and your loss So long as you’ll die for The poppy and the cross
He holds a shepherd’s crook And he wears a bishop’s hat The old soldier said to me What do you make of that Here to give the slaughter Some of his pious gloss Here to lead the prayers For the poppy and the cross
The poppy and the cross God and country and the rest It’s amazing what you’ll suffer To be told that you’re the best His Majesty don’t care For your sorrow and your loss So long as you’ll die for The poppy and the cross
Don’t confuse sacrifice With being sacrificed The old soldier spoke Of the wicked loss of life King and country, God and crown Will never count the cost It’s you and I that die For the poppy and the cross
The poppy and the cross King and country and the rest It’s amazing what you’ll suffer To be told that you’re the best His Majesty don’t care For your sorrow and your loss So long as you’ll die for The poppy and the cross
The moon shone bright, the frost was cruel He lived a good league hence But here to gather winter fuel Lest he should burn the forest fence
When Wenceslas he did espy And cried out Sire, why walk you by And no longer bring me pine logs hither Ye, who would bless the poor A Christian man, good and sure Whose allowance he’s content to wither
Wenceslas, full of grace Struck the peasant in the face Then struck again as he lay prone Admonishing, leave me alone
Therefore, English men be sure Without rank possessing Question Wenceslas’s care And you’ll receive his blessing
In the New Austerity Inn Where the beer tastes of poverty and spin Rachel plays a tiny violin (Singing) You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it
In the New Austerity Inn Where old folk aspire for a warm around the fire Rachel leads the budget choir (Singing) You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it
In the New Austerity Inn The New Austerity Inn In the New Austerity Inn The New Austerity Inn
In the New Austerity Inn The guvnor’s got a new suit, new tie, new boots He says everything’s reduced (But) You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it
In the New Austerity Inn The New Austerity Inn In the New Austerity Inn The New Austerity Inn
It was just like this with George in charge A bloke at the bar says he voted Farage And Rachel shouts “Now we’re in charge” In the New Austerity Inn The New Austerity Inn In the New Austerity Inn The New Austerity Inn (And) You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it You can’t have it if you can’t afford it We can’t have it if they can’t afford it We can’t have it if they can’t afford it We can’t have it if they can’t afford it We can’t have it if they can’t afford it
Tina believed the Big Lie Now Tina’s gonna have to let time go by ‘Cause Tina broke in to the voting machine To try to prove that Donald’s hands were clean But Donald’s hands are dirty as hell Now Tina’s hands are dirty as well Now Tina’s gonna have to let time go by ‘Cause Tina believed the Big Lie….(and My Pillow Guy)
Tina and My Pillow Guy Tina and My Pillow Guy (and the Big Lie) Tina and My Pillow Guy Will have to say goodbye
Tina believed in My Pillow Guy Now Tina’s gonna have to let time go by ‘Cause Tina broke into the voting machine To try to prove that Donald’s hands were clean But Donald’s hands are dirty as hell And Mike’s hands are dirty as well Now Tina’s gonna have to let time go by ‘Cause Tina believed in My Pillow Guy
Tina and My Pillow Guy Tina and My Pillow Guy (and the Big Lie) Tina and My Pillow Guy Will have to say goodbye
Tina believed the Big Lie Now Tina’s gonna have to let time go by Tina broke into the voting machine To try to prove that Donald’s hands were clean But Donald’s hands are dirty as hell Now Tina’s hands are dirty as well And Tina’s gonna have to let time go by ‘Cause Tina believed the Big Lie
A cloth so fine I’ll weave for you The great and good can only view The likes of which you’ve never seen And best of all the suit is free
You’ll have clothes like no one else The best of everything he sells The people they will never see And best of all, the suit is free
Meet the new boss, same as the old boss Wearing the same invisible cloth
The people look, the people stare From Clacton to Trafalgar Square The people look, the people stare But they all know there’s nothing there
The bobbin span, the shuttle flew The sick, he said, have work to do The finest cloth is meant for me And best of all, the suit is free
The finest cloth on the machine Though there was nothing to be seen No marvel that his eye could see But nonetheless the suit was free
Meet the new boss, same as the old boss Meet the new boss, same as the old boss Wearing the same invisible cloth
The people look, the people stare From Clacton to Trafalgar Square The people look, the people stare But they all know there’s nothing there
Tough choices, did he have the spine To say I see no cloth so fine The cloth the great and good could see But best of all the suit was free
Tough choices, but you know the rest The cloth, he said, was of the best The cloth the great and good could see But best of all the suit was free
Meet the new boss, same as the old boss Meet the new boss, same as the old boss Meet the new boss, same as the old boss Wearing the same invisible cloth
The people look, the people stare From Clacton to Trafalgar Square The people look, the people stare But they all know there’s nothing there
The people look, the people stare From Clacton to Trafalgar Square The people look, the people stare But they all know there’s nothing there
Steve White & The Protest Family 