Nigel the talking frog’s coin-operated
A cameo Nazi for just a few quid
Birthday greetings for the racist on a budget
Send your pal a Kick-‘Em-Out Farage vid
Nigel the talking frog’s coin-operated
A cameo Nazi bought and paid for
What he’d say for free, he says for a fee
The grift that the internet was made for
I never liked carrying Churchill in my pocket
But now no one ever uses cash to pay
Still, I’d rather have a hedgehog on a fiver
Than a warmongering toff any day
Raises his fists up to his eyes
Waves them slowly side to side
Waves them like a fist goodbye
To children where his bombers fly
A pumpkin he, made rotting flesh
Dancing ‘til there’s nothing left
His awful orange swaying heft
Of simple principle bereft
An ogre’s dance in tracer light
An ogre’s sleight, an ogre’s spite
An ogre’s drooling appetite
The ogre set the world alight
The first one got him in the ear, I hear
The second one a hole away, never got near
The third, the wrong house when he threw his hat in
What price, US, a decent assassin
In a country that shoots fifty thousand a year
And the best they can do is a clip round the ear
Son of a toolmaker Kier
Now wants to kill deer
Dear deer-killer Kier
Oh dear
What’s this new frontier?
Venison for tea
For every detainee
Of His Majesty?
While lunchers at school
Or in hospital
Pick shot from their teeth?
Good grief
The poor deer, in fear
Chased on horse by a peer
Then shot in the ear
Or maybe pursued
By a volunteer
With a spear
Not a good idea, Kier
You’ll learn
We await your u-turn
With bated breath
We guess you have
A couple left
He’s swapped the royal balcony
For the inside of a cell
He’s given back the Order of St. Olav as well
But while he denies Virginia
To the Thames Valley Police
There will still be no justice
No peace
He outsourced his outrage at his failing living standards to the racists
Subcontracted his fear about his children’s future years to the transphobes
He offset his anger about a council that won’t try
To a campaign against the RNLI
He’s backing Nigel ‘cause he tells him who to hate, when he’s just trying to get by
He farmed out his frustration at house price inflation to Islamophobes
Delegated his dismay on another budget day to deniers of asylum seekers’ rights
He exported consternation at his pub in liquidation
To roundabout and lamppost decorators
He’s backing Nigel ‘cause he tells him who to hate, and who are traitors
He doesn’t empathise ‘cause he doesn’t understand
He doesn’t understand ‘cause he won’t listen
He won’t listen ‘cause no one’s helped his problems go away
He won’t listen ‘cause hears politicians
Not listening every day
It’s Epstein o’clock for Mandy
Epstein o’clock for Lord Pete
Epstein o’clock, just like Andy
Soon to live on Used-To-Have-A-Title Street
It’s Epstein o’clock for Petey
Even though he says he didn’t partake
It ain’t much of an entreaty
When you’re selling the secrets of the state
It’s Epstein o’clock for Mandy
Hey, Prince of Darkness, it’s Epstein o’clock
Soon for a bunch of very rich bastards
It’ll be Epstein o’clock
Tick, tock
Rubio, Witkoff and Blair
Like a bad firm of solicitors
Here to handle the paperwork
For Gaza-Lago
On behalf of the Bored of Peace
How warm are your stables?
How bent are your tax affairs?
How pliable your opinion?
How shallow are your cares?
How warm are your stables?
How thick are your lies?
How cheap is your loyalty?
You joined Reform, surprise!
Steve White & The Protest Family 