It’s happy hour in The New Austerity Inn
And a fight’s already broken out
If you can’t afford it, you can’t have it
Rachel cries, as another brick flies
And machetes are drawn in the street outside
Someone’s set fire to a police van
Someone’s shouting at Keith with a wreath
Someone says what about the children
A small voice what about the children
But the far right are flying the flag
And Rachel says God Save The King
Month: July 2024
Untitled (26 July 2024)
Kicked in the head by airport cops
While Dujardin flogs her horse
For sections of the listenership
The horse was worse of course
Now she’s not going to the Olympics
But the child rapist is
What jobs should rapists be allowed
Is Thursday’s phone-in quiz
On Leading Britain’s Conversation
The hang and flog ‘em crowd
Who never stop to ask
Why Tommy Robinson’s allowed
Which leaves it up to us
To never let the haters win
Leading Britain’s Racists
Back to the fuckin’ bin
Tapping their fascist toes
To Louise Distras, I suppose
A far cry from The Factory Floor
And The Hand You Hold
I suspect this ain’t the album
That many folk were sold
Don’t give up hope
Beryl would remind us
It remains a slippery slope
The Bullet Came From His Side of the Wall
It got him in the ear
But was aiming for his head
He was up shaking his fist
When he could’ve been brown bread
Underneath a Secret Service sprawl
And the bullet came from his side of the wall
It got him in the ear
And he didn’t even duck
But some others in the crowd
Didn’t have that kind of luck
Corey Contemporare took the fall
And the bullet came from his side of the wall
It got him in the ear
It was a bit tin anyway
He’s less of a listener
And more I’ll have my say
Now he’s a shoe-in for the Whitehouse in the fall
And the bullet came from his side of the wall
Spain 2-1 England
He packs away the pop-up tent
The kids were watching in
And sends congrats
To friends viewing in Spain
In high streets up and down the land
The homeward trudge of England fans
The disappointment
And the not again
No shame in second best
But the DV stats attest
That some blokes really shouldn’t mix booze
With their pain
The armchair rancour piles up
As Morata lifts the cup
Brings an end
To the ’24 campaign
Joe Biden vs. George Clooney
Uncle Joe drops bombs
But he’s stopped telling rights from wrongs
And knowing who is who (is who?)
What’s a democrat to do?
Big fucking deal to big fuck all
Is what fifty million saw
Or fifty-one, says favourite son
George Clooney, born in ‘61
With earnest Hollywood clout
Who’s gonna keep the wall guy out?
Dark Clouds Over Clacton
They say that it may have stopped raining
They say the sun might come out
But there are dark clouds over Clacton
Giving me doubt
They say that it may have stopped raining
They say that they can clearly see
But there are dark clouds over Clacton
Troubling me
They say there’s a new skipper at the helm
They say he has a steady hand
But there are dark clouds over Clacton
And we’re still miles from land
They say there’s a new skipper at the helm
They say he takes things seriously
But there are dark clouds over Clacton
Troubling me
Dark clouds over Clacton
Dark clouds and a stormy sea
There are dark clouds over Clacton
Troubling me
They say that the day that you see the devil
He steals away a piece of your soul
Now the dark clouds over Clacton
Feel so cold
They say that the day that you see the devil
His laugh will never leave you be
Now there are dark clouds over Clacton
Troubling me
Dark clouds over Clacton
Dark clouds and a stormy sea
There are dark clouds over Clacton
Troubling me
They say that all we need is a fair wind
A fair wind and a following sea
But there are dark clouds over Clacton
Troubling me
A Break in the Weather
I hear that it might have stopped raining
There’s finally some sun forecast
But there are dark clouds over Clacton
A break in the weather that may not last
The Jolly Capitalist
Nick the jolly capitalist is happy to explain
How all you need is love and you really shouldn’t complain
Because every billionaire has a billionaire dad
And love is all you need ‘cause love is all you ever had
Nick the jolly capitalist is happy to explain
That cheap and cheerful really is a money-making game
So Vimes cannot afford the boots in which he should be stood
But a cheap pair every year cost more than good ones ever would
Oh, I wish I was as happy as Nick
I wouldn’t have to care about the poor and the sick
But I want other folk to be
At least as well off as me
And while I understand the money trick
I’ll never be as happy as Nick
Nick the jolly capitalist is happy to explain
How landlords are the ones who really have it all to gain
‘Cause while you pay their mortgages there’s social housing shortages
So you should just be grateful they don’t Section 21
Nick the jolly capitalist is happy to explain
How shitting in the river is the ultimate aim
Because if selling off the water ain’t enough to make you mad
Then selling off the NHS won’t seem half as bad
Oh, I wish I was as happy as Nick
I wouldn’t have to care about the poor and the sick
But I want other folk to be
At least as well off as me
And while I understand the money trick
I’ll never be as happy as Nick
Nick the jolly capitalist is happy to explain
How the 7th of October was the start of the campaign
Drones and bombs and missiles are a lucrative supply
Just requires the application of a little blind eye
Nick the jolly capitalist is happy to explain
That when a foodbank opens up he opens up the champagne
Because if the poor feed the poor what is the government for
But making rick folk richer than they’ve ever been before
Oh, I wish I was as happy as Nick
I wouldn’t have to care about the poor and the sick
But I want other folk to be
At least as well off as me
And while I understand the money trick
I’ll never be as happy as Nick
Nick the jolly capitalist is happy to explain
How all you need is love and you really shouldn’t complain
Because every billionaire has a billionaire dad
And love is all you need ‘cause love is all you ever had
Oh, I wish I was as happy as Nick
I wouldn’t have to care about the poor and the sick
But I want other folk to be
At least as well off as me
And while I understand the money trick
I’ll never be as happy as Nick
Steve White & The Protest Family 