Eating People

When the economy won’t grow
And there’s nowhere else to go
It’s not considered evil
For the rich to just eat people

They don’t want to eat you up
But over runneth their cup
And when it’s this unequal
The rich will just eat people

They can’t live in all the houses
But they can own all the houses
Which turns out to be legal
When the rich start eating people

And when the rich start eating people
Some of them will be quite gleeful
Saying it’s a rising tide
We’re just waiting for our ride

Which of course will never come
Because when all’s said and done
It’s simply medieval
For the rich to just eat people

Women 0-1 Oh, East London

Not my bus
Not my people
Oh, East London
Is not for me

Stock sexism
From stocky sexists
Raucous drunks
Bray look at me

Oh, it’s your day
A clap hooray
The boys’ derisive
Repartee

Tits, fanny and Orient’s
Big day out
Goes back in time
Oh, referee!

Non-Binary

Everybody’s got
Two eyes, two ears, two hands, two feet
That’s why some think that binary is right
Well, it might be alright for George Galloway
But people ain’t as simple as night or day
And we’re all on a spectrum like light
Electro-magnetic radiation
It’s true we’re all members of a rainbow nation
And it ain’t as simple as identification
Because everybody has a right
Not necessarily to be who they want to be
Or I’d be Che Guevara in a racing car
Or at the very least a massive rock ‘n’ roll star
But we all deserve to burn bright
And everybody has a right
To be who they are

The Art of Looking Away

Dead children
Funny cats
Dead children
Our ten best hacks
Dead children
Suspicious activity
Dead children
Click here to see
Dead children
Meghan and Harry
Dead children
Are they really unhappy
Dead children
How to get an upgrade
Dead children
Review and get paid
Dead children
The great game
Dead children
It’s always been the same
Dead children
Buy or sell
The burning man cries Free Palestine
Perhaps he wasn’t well

Just Another Day at Elbit

There’s a man in a factory in Leicester
Fixing wings onto military drones
He breaks at eleven for coffee
While they bomb Palestinian homes

She smiles as he hands her a cuppa
Looking up from her targeting grids
She likes it when he brings her coffee
While they shoot Palestinian kids

He waits as she blows it cool gently
And wonders if he should just ask her
What is she doing this Friday
While we watch the destruction of Gaza

There’s a man in a factory in Leicester
Dreaming of romance and love
Through his nine to five military systems
Assembling death from above

Unlucky Street

Phone shop
Vape shop
Chicken shop
Bookies

It used to be so sweet
Now it’s Unlucky Street

High crime
Traffic fine
Sex attacks
And decline

Phone shop
Vape shop
Chicken shop
Bookies

It used to be so sweet
Now it’s Unlucky Street

Fly tipped
Dog shit
County lines
Conflict

High crime
Traffic fine
Sex attacks
And decline

Phone shop
Vape shop
Chicken shop
Bookies

It used to be so sweet
Now it’s Unlucky Street

Front garden sofas
Poverty sarcomas
Everyone you know does
A shrug of the shoulders

At fly tipped
Dog shit
County lines
Conflict

High crime
Traffic fine
Sex attacks
And decline

Phone shop
Vape shop
Chicken shop
Bookies

It used to be so sweet
Now it’s Unlucky Street

Tags in the litter
A mattress in the river
Stand and deliver
Throw up a pigeon’s dinner

On front garden sofas
Poverty sarcomas
Everyone you know does
A shrug of the shoulders

At fly tipped
Dog shit
County lines
Conflict

High crime
Traffic fine
Sex attacks
And decline

Phone shop
Vape shop
Chicken shop
Bookies

It used to be so sweet
Now it’s Unlucky Street

Robbery’s a failure
Antisocial behaviour
Jesus Christ our saviour
Do us all a favour

Tags in the litter
A mattress in the river
Stand and deliver
Throw up a pigeon’s dinner

On front garden sofas
Poverty sarcomas
Everyone you know does
A shrug of the shoulders

At fly tipped
Dog shit
County lines
Conflict

High crime
Traffic fine
Sex attacks
And decline

Phone shop
Vape shop
Chicken shop
Bookies

It used to be so sweet
Now it’s Unlucky Street

St Kitts and Nevis vs Greene King

Much to Catherine and Thomas’ disgust
Benny liked keeping a slave
They thought that abolition was just
He thought they should just behave


In fact, Benny liked keeping slaves so much
He purchased his local paper
And ran articles, polemics and such
About how he’d done slaves a favour


They’re much better clothed
And much better housed
And much better fed
The Herald espoused
Than your average English labour


He’d met Buck in the chapel
And they’d set about brewing beer
For the good, the great and the rabble
Of Bury St Edmunds, in the year


Of Our Lord Eighteen Hundred and Six
Old ale and porter too
And when The Blake’s found themselves in a fix
It was Benny who came through


And said, I’ll manage your plantations
In Monserrat and St Kitts
And many generations of Greenes
Will reap the benefits


His business grew, his chattels too
And though he found trafficking abhorrent
Keeping slaves, he’d happily pursue
As necessity, so he’d warrant


He fought the passage of The Slave Trade Act
Even quoting The Bible on occasion
And by 1833 he’d attract
Libel action, to his frustration

And so, three years later, he was off to the City
Leaving Edward to brew the beer
The compensation for freedom, more’s the pity
Going to Benny, not the slaves, it’s clear


Half a million in today’s money
Is what ol’ Benny got
While the freed slaves, not so lucky
Well, they got not a lot


And the wages on the plantations
That the freed slaves were now making
Never matched the profits or remunerations
That the Greene family were taking


And while Edward was running the brewery
Young Charles went out to St Kitts
Able, but with much tomfoolery
He left behind thirteen kids, the family now admits


All of whom were born illegitimately
As discovered by Sir Hugh Carleton Greene
Himself director of the BBC
And a great-nephew of Charlie Greene


(The novelist, Graeme Greene
Was another who carried the gene)


Now the good folk of St Kitts and Nevis
Frustrated by our government’s hesitation
Have said to Greene King, you owe us this
We demand our reparation


For the slavery days of Benny Greene
The money that he made
4.6 billion in 2019
Once off the backs of slaves


So, put down your pint of IPA
And listen to their tale
There’s more than hops, yeast and barley
In the story of your ale