Tag: king charles iii

I Do Not Want a King at All

I do not want a king at all
A coronation big or small
A diddy one or six feet tall
I do not want a king at all

I do not want one in a crown
Or in an ermine-trimmed posh gown
Right way up or upside down
As a verb or as a noun
Called Charles or Harold, even Saul
I do not want a king at all

I do not want a king at all
With neat handwriting or a scrawl
I want to click on uninstall
I do not want a king at all

I do not want a king for me
For breakfast, dinner, lunch and tea
Owning all the eye can see
By some historical decree
I do not want a jubilee
Or forced smile RP repartee
“How long have you been a tree?”
On broken glass I’d rather crawl
I do not want a king at all

I do not want one with fat fingers
Or with a royal stench than lingers
From royal floaters or royal sinkers
I do not want a king that tinkers
In London or in Montreal
I do not want a king at all

I do not want one with big ears
I do not need “Oh dear, oh dears”
Or a face that now appears
On stamps and coins and souvenirs
Who hunts foxes and shoots deers
Assents to laws and interferes
Has his toothpaste squeezed by Paul
I do not want a king at all

I do not want a king at all
Don’t want his picture on the wall
Or naming a new hospital
One of forty, after all
He can’t be big unless we’re small
I do not want a king at all

by Categories: poetry, SteveTags: , , , 1 Comment

Untitled (13 September 2022)

The Queen is dead, long live the King
With barely pause for breath
Or chance for anyone to ask
If this is for the best
The new PM, not camera-shy
Jumps aboard the royal ride
She wants those headline stories
King Charles the Third, King of the Tories
And old in years but new in post
Big Ears agreed to be her host
As they set out to tour the land
Of crowds policed with heavy hand
Where protest is all but banned
(Such a heinous caper
To hold aloft a piece of paper
Or call out your response
To the presence of a sweaty nonce)
Meanwhile, back in Parliament
The doors stay firmly closed
So no one hears the argument
Against a king imposed
Or his parade’s flamboyance
In a time of crisis
Or his tax avoidance
And the powers that allow this
(Three hundred million quid
God forbid
Remain in royal coffers
Received with little thanks, cap doffers)
No effective government
Since Spaffer’s slow departure
The new Tory incumbent
Threatens even harder
And mourning not withstanding
Has plans to keep rich standing
While the poor just quietly fall
It’s what she would’ve wanted, after all

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A King’s Inheritance

He inherits the title
Inherits the land
Inherits police
Who with firm hand
Remove any protest
At his quick accession
There’ll be no dissent
At this royal procession

He inherits the title
Inherits the power
The proceeds of empire
His to devour
He inherits the poor
The homeless, the weak
Whose faith in the monarch
Is honest but bleak

He inherits the title
Inherits the wealth
To him it’s tax-free
As they sing to his health
Happy and glorious
God save the King
He doesn’t owe you
A damn fucking thing

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Respect, Obey (The Suppression of Protest)

They’re sat on thrones
Respect, obey
Their royal bones are on display
Respect, obey them sat on thrones
Respect, obey their royal bones

They’re sat on thrones
Respect, obey
Hold fast your stones
Now’s not the day
Now’s not the day, hold fast your stones
Respect, obey their royal bones
They’re sat on thrones
Respect, obey

They’re sat on thrones
Respect, obey
Their royal bones are on display
The speaker drones, respect, obey
Hold fast your stones, now’s not the day
Respect, obey their royal bones
They’re sat on thrones
Respect, obey

They’re sat on thrones
Respect, obey
The speaker drones, respect, obey
The priest intones, respect, obey
The pauper groans
Respect, obey
Hold fast your stones, now’s not the day
Their royal bones are on display
Their royal bones
They’re sat on thrones
Now’s not the day
Respect, obey

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