Cats, Dogs, Transgender Mice

Of course there was no funding for transgender mice, it was for transgenic mice, but what does the truth matter when there’s culture wars to be fought. Meanwhile in Springfield, Ohio…

Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
And the big ginger cat ain’t very nice

The cats say a mouse born with a penis
That mouse can never be a Venus

While the dogs say a mouse born under the wrong star
Has the right to be the mouse that they really are

Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
And the big ginger cat ain’t very nice

In Springfield, they’re eating the cats

The cats won’t share their litter tray
With a mouse who might not go that way

The dogs are cool, there’s nothing amiss
With a mouse who might just need to take a piss

Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
And the big ginger cat ain’t very nice

In Springfield, they’re eating the dogs

The cats are like, eight million dollars
Unlimited catnip and diamante collars

The dogs are like, eight million bucks, but hey
We’d have buried it in the garden anyway

Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
And the big ginger cat ain’t very nice

In Springfield, nobody eats the mice

Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
Cats, dogs, transgender mice
And the big ginger cat ain’t very nice