Derek Won’t Wear a Mask

“It’s unconstitutional” Derek proclaims
With absolute authority.
“It’s an attack on my civil liberties,
This isn’t why the majority
Voted for Boris, it’s an outrage,
It’s halfway to wearing a burqa.
I’m not putting my face in a fabric cage
Like a nurse or a care home worker.
What are you, scared? Of a little flu?
Your argument’s full of if’s and but’s.
It ain’t much longer than a week or two
Since Johnson told you to have the guts
To get back to normal, and normal it ain’t
To be ordered to cover your face
And that the basis of my complaint:
We never needed ‘em in the first place.
It’s not supported by the science, you’re wrong
It’s a monstrous imposition
And I’ll tell you what, it won’t be long
Until they’re back with another condition,
‘Cos it’s an exercise in mind control
Manipulating the sheeple
With a very simple goal:
To sleepwalk you into the unspeakable.
It’s a free country and I should be free
To allow my patriotic face to be seen.
We didn’t win two world wars
And one world cup……
And anyway, it’s a bit uncomfortable
And it makes my glasses steam up”.